You never saw me as I am.
I was wrong, I was banned.
Afraid you’d find out I was sick,
That you’d one day meet my ‘ick’
I held on to your words,
I let you tell me what I deserved.
I let you tell me how to be.
I was eager to believe,
that if only I could be her,
I wouldn’t cry, I wouldn’t hurt.
I hid behind your strength,
My soul crumbling beneath,
your expectations and rules,
My essence sedated, my spirit confused.
You may have had what you wanted
the perfect life so you could flaunt it
Flaunting me: this is her and she is me
Was I a robot or human being?
I might have been breathing
but I was slowly dying
And you still kept on denying
that I spent so many years crying
I can still see it in your eyes
It’s not like I was trying to feed you lies
It just felt safer to hide.
SWL 